This Time it's Sink or Swim

Sometimes there are moments in your life that shake your world, tip it upside down and turn it inside out. These moments unbalance you so much that you have no choice but to change; to think about your life and where it's going. It makes you think about what you want in life and where you want your life to go.

It wakes you up.

I finally know what it is I want. I have made a plan for my life that has room for improvement and change. I want to better myself in my career; and actually work towards my goals instead of hanging back and just coasting through life.

It's an incredible feeling.

G!

Yes, I got my full G license today! That is such a load off! :D Everything seems to be coming together, I don't have to worry about as much now :)

Some of you may have noticed that I don't have a boyfriend anymore. It wasn't working out for me, and although I feel really bad that I hurt his feelings, he will find someone better suited for him. The same goes for me. I don't think we wanted the same things, and it was better in the long run to end it now.

I'm also really happy, sort of, that my license "expires" soon. It means that I get to have a new picture taken for my ID but it costs 75 dollars to renew it for five more years :(

I also really need to decide what dude ranch I want to go to when I travel. Hmmmm.

Travelling!!

Yeah, I really have to stop this 'posting once every few months' thing I have going. My life just isn't that interesting though!

Well, okay. It probably wasn't the smartest idea in the world, but I thought and thought it over many, many times. I quit my job. Thing is, I didn't have another job lined up to replace it. I chose not to get another job, because A: I did not want to wait the time it would take to find another job. B: I'm going to travel!!!

I am sooo, so excited to go. I'm going sometime in July, I haven't decided when but I will be going to BC and Alberta. I'm joining this tour set up by Contiki Tours for adults 18 - 35. They do pretty much all the planning for you so all you have to do is enjoy yourself! Oh it looks so beautiful there!

I'm also going to a dude ranch XD I haven't decided if I want to do that before or after the tour. I'm thinking after that way I can unwind from the adventures I will be having. The ranch I chose is so pretty and the landscape looks amazing! I haven't been horseback riding in so long, I can't wait!

I would be riding now...but with quitting my job I can't afford it! :( It was my choice though...it sucks, but that's life I suppose. I can't have everything, after all.

I work until the 26th of May and then its off to Anime North. Honestly, I'm not all that excited about it. I'm going, because I don't want to miss it again and I've already booked everything. It just seems like money is going into it that I could use in July. I don't plan on buying anything except food, so there is that.

I will be going as Merle from Escaflowne! Now, that I am happy about because I love her and it'll be fun going to a photoshoot with other Escaflowne cosplayers. I also should let it be known that while I don't plan on buying anything does not mean I won't. If I see the Escaflowne movie and/or series I am getting it, no questions asked.

New Year!

I could post all about my New Year resolutions, but there probably isn't much point since they aren't likely to last XD but despite getting a cold, this year is shaping up to be a pretty good one.

I'm going to start riding again and begin looking to buy my own horse. Work is good, I'm getting a lot of experience working with the horses which is awesome. I'm so happy where I am right now, it's great. I don't think I've been this happy in a long time, to be honest.

Everything just seems to be going in the right direction. It's nice being able to look at the present rather than worry about the future and remember the past. I'm content right where I am.

I feel like I actually belong at my work place, surrounded by people who share and understand the same passion that I do. Sure, it has it's rough patches but what doesn't in life? I do my best to not worry about that but rather focus on the positives. Some days I do better than others, but I'm human, it's to be expected. It doesn't mean I'm not happy.

Saturday, if I have the energy, I'm going to look at places to begin riding again. I miss it so much, it's not even funny. I look at everyone riding at work and am envious, it's gotten so bad.

I love being able to walk across the river and go into the forest on the other side. The tracks I've found are so interesting. I saw deer tracks, rabbit and squirrel, even possibly coyote, although I'm not sure about those.

I can't wait for winter to be over though. I'm done with the cold! Come on, spring!! XD T-shirts and shorts!

I'm so surprised right now though...I lost ten pounds! I want it back! XD I think it's because of the fat I lost working, I need to gain muscle to get it back! Problem is that I am gaining muscle...I'm starting to get man arms D: tiny man arms, but still man arms. My back looks gross too...the muscles are nasty! I feel bad, I want muscles but I don't want them to look gross...*sigh* I was also looking in the mirror and I can see the bones in my upper chest just under my collar bone...it's nasty. Why can't I just lose fat where I want, namely my stomach...but no...of course it doesn't work that way XD

Ah well, I shouldn't really be complaining :D